Hard enough when the children are caught misbehaving, but what do you do about a misbehaving supervisor?
Shocked into mute
Meg had been in a professional position for years when the business closed, and Meg was forced to look for work elsewhere. Meg found what she thought was a dream job. Then her supervisor was promoted and she found herself with the negative image of her former supervisor. Where Don came in and greeted her in the morning, and they would take care of matters for the day, Jim was pouty, closed his door on arrival, and didn't speak to anyone until well past 11:00 o'clock. The first time Meg was exposed to his wrath, she thought her ears would fall off. His voice was megaphonic, and Meg was shocked into silence.
Helpless for several hours
After the storm had passed, Meg was non-functioning for several hours. It was all she could do to shuffle papers around on her desk, and answer the phone. Meg knew everyone had heard the commotion and felt embarrassed for Jim. No one else in their department had ever come close to behaving the way he had. Everyone was friendly and helped each other when opportunities presented themselves. There was no excuse for his behavior, and Meg didn't understand it.
Repeated episodes
Several more episodes had tempted her to leave, and for some time Meg entertained the notion, but the thought of going job hunting again made her decide against it. She had been in the position for several years, knew the job, and had done it well. She also thought about submitting a complaint, but to whom? Jim's supervisor was one office away and seemed oblivious to his outbursts. Was Meg missing something? Was there something she needed to know?
Understanding the problem
One day Meg decided to talk to her former supervisor, who had also gone a round or two with Jim, and always seemed to remain calm and unruffled. What was his secret? Of course, he was on the same management level, and had a very calm personality (played golf a lot) and Meg thought he might be able to help her see her way past the problem. He was very understanding, and somewhat helpful. He mentioned that Jim had a personality disorder, but was very intelligent and had escaped dismissal because he always delivered what was expected, and worked long hours. The personality disorder revelation stuck in Meg's mind. It did occur to her, at one point, that Jim needed some sort of treatment, but Meg hadn't imagined he had a full-blown disorder.
What you can do
Meg was not prepared to give up the job, and so she began devising ways to communicate with Jim without actually talking with him. It seemed that emails were the solution, and when Meg needed to go into his office, she'd wait until he'd left on an errand to leave or remove paperwork. It was a strategy that worked well for Meg. When she left, she and Jim were on good terms.
If you need to stay on the job, and have a supervisor who misbehaves, you may find a reason, realize it's not your fault, and find a way to strategize around it. Meg did.
